Monday, 16 May 2011

Am I the Manager or the Maid?

When I was a child, I didn't know anyone who wanted to be a maid when she grew up. My friends and I may have daydreamed about having a maid someday, but we certainly never considered being one.
     The reasons were obvious. We didn't want a job that was considered dull, repetitive, or one that demanded hard work for low pay.
     But since I've had children, I have found it much harder to avoid being a maid than I once thought. I can go around my house picking up puzzle pieces, clothes, toys, crayons, shoes, food, and books from off the floor, only to find myself an hour later picking up puzzle pieces, clothes, toys, crayons, shoes, food, and books. It seems that ordering me around is almost second nature to my children. "Find me my socks!" "Gimmie some milk!". And I really feel like a maid when everyone else in the family is lolling around enjoying life, while m the only one who cares how the house looks and the only one who does anything about it.
     But I don't want to be a maid now any more than I wanted to be when I was young. And I'm beginning to learn that I don't have to be one. With the change in the perspective, I can be a manager instead.
     Manager are respected coz their work involves responsibility, skill, and tact. Managers have vision- they can see how the routine tasks of today can help an organization reach tomorrow's goals. Managers jus don't decide that something has to be done; they plan how, when, and by whom it must be done. Managers make each person feel valued and important and encourage them to work together for the benefit of the whole.
     Becoming a manager from being a maid was not an overnight change. It has taken a while for me to convince myself that teaching, training, and involving children in housework as a manager is preferable to doing it alone like a maid. And of course, when I work by myself, I tend to do it faster, jobs are done better and no complaints. But as a manager, I think involving children in the household works, what is being taught goes far beyond the household tasks. We're learning about family cooperation, responsibilities, and pride in  job well done--- These are all the long-range benefits that are worth the short-term inconveniences.
     When I'm a manager I not only decide that the task will be done, but i also choose which hour of the day and which day of the week to do any of my responsibilities. And only my imagination limits how I will carry them out. For instance, when m done with my laundry, I'd have my children to fold clothes and help a young child practice matching skills using the family's sock.
     When m a manager, my foremost priority is the people in the family. It's true that meals need to be cooked, clothes need to be laundered, and the house has to be kept clean, but I have to remember that the reason I do all this is to make my home a pleasant environment for my family and I want my children to understand this concept too. They help with chores, not to please Mom or to be her slave, but because it benefits them and helps the home be a happier and more comfortable place for everyone. When people are my priority, I think of my job as one of the teaching, loving, and encouraging, rather than one of scrubbing, washing, and cooking.
     I have found that it's not my family who decides whether I'm going to be a manager or a maid. Rather, I decide which job I want, and my family responds accordingly. When I act like a maid they order me around like a maid. When I act like a manager, they respect me for my creativity I bring to my job.I'm convinced that even though my children enjoy the convenience of having a maid wait on them, they are much happier when I'm providing direction in my role as a manager. I,m much happier, too.
     When I chose to be a manager instead of a maid, I enjoy striving for long-term goals while working to meet short-term needs. It is very challenging to kids and mother. I also appreciate the teamwork, cooperation, and mutual respect and understanding I feel among family members. 
     I love my job, my position and my career as a stay-at-home mom. And last but not the least, a big THANK YOU to my husband, my  backbone,  my support system for always being there in all my challenges.


  1. Mostly I am a manager too. They say the best thing you can do for a child is to give them confidence and self reliance and self reliance comes when they have hands on experience of life skills. I am working on that too, sometimes making it fun works, sometimes little dictator ship is needed too but mostly successful partnership between the family members is the key. When everyone realizes their responsibilities, no one is maid anymore.:) Love your blogs, keep them coming.

  2. Its so very tru, Hina. Well said !! And thanx for the appretiation :)

  3. Great post!! I wish I had read it when my kids were younger.

  4. I really enjoy your blog and would like to give you an award. It's on the awards page on my blog:

  5. Hey Thanks Dana , I really appretiate your Gesture. God Bless n Take care :)